Away with friends this year instead of the time old classic of going for drinks and dinner, watching the fireworks or any other habitual example you can think of. It’s not that I am above all of it this year, it’s just that I’m not sure what I would be celebrating, another year - with restrictive freedoms still likely being something we coexist with, it’s different somehow. This year more than ever I think it is important to be around people with who we can all be ourselves with, people who appreciate your quirks judgment-free.
We like many have opted for a quiet getaway, not too far away from home but hopefully far enough to give us the perspective and distance needed to be able to form the bigger picture plans that we used to find in travel and experience beyond our own four walls and countries boarders.
I wonder how this year’s resolutions will be able to form knowing we (most of us) have been unable to have any perspective beyond our day to day. Being so localised does limit the breath of an idea to some extent or at least in terms of the planning and mapping out what year on year tend to be conversations about dreams and goals. (Both achievable and unachievable.)
Is a new year a fresh start?
A new beginning, like that of seeing in a new year, does seem to symbolise the shedding of skin, one that for the majority of us has been littered with sadness, hardship and moments of feeling like you are living in a movie. It’s no wonder that with the imaginary new seal that we each break on January 1st we see a rise in wellness, health, fitness and all things diet-related. It makes me think about the temporary nature of these resolutions, and how with a slight change in vocabulary some of these might be not only more attainable but better for us in the long term.
What if, instead of going all out to the extremes like ‘never eating sugar again’ we build on the healthier choices we have been making over the last couple of years. If we focused on the small incremental improvements, developments or areas of focus (however you would explain any positive habits you have adopted) we might stand a chance of getting somewhere nearer to our goal.
"I wonder if the breaking of a resolution is by its very nature the bind itself."
What is a resolution to you, how do you communicate it to yourself?
As an alternative to new years resolutions we looked for things to shine a light on, things we got better at and want to see further improvement or even just the things we found more time for. Slowly but surely the resolution would appear as the change that we have been hoping for.
Think about it, the word resolution is a decision, a statement, or a promise. These all seem very final and very black and white. A pass or fail is the option you have. Those odds have a lot of added pressure, it’s ok if you do not thrive under these circumstances. If you are anything like me you have likely added in a timeline, a standard and a date to review. (This is not recommended.)
I wonder if the breaking of a resolution is by its very nature the bind itself. We make it too hard because it’s as easy to fail at it as it is to succeed. If by contrast, we choose an improvement, development, or area of focus something that we cannot fail or succeed in, we will merely progress and at the heart of all choices isn’t that the desired result.
Could it be that a change in vocabulary is what we might need in this years count down? A nicer and more gentle approach to aid the positive change in life. Ask yourself, what do I want to spend more time and focus on? Is there an area of my life that I would like to develop and how can some focus help improve my skills or understanding in this area.
How to make Resolutions attainable?
It might be a health goal, a work goal, a financial goal, whatever it is, focus and incremental improvements will likely get you there as fast, if not faster than simply deciding on Jan 1st that it is what you want. You are very likely already on the way to your dream with the habits you have, explore your habits and push yourself forward.
Be nice to yourself and look after yourself, all things are possible - but you will always have to put the work in, what if this year you recognised the work in progress, the effort already spent? What if you just pause and revisit the resolutions you had 10 years ago, how many of those have you already succeeded in? And of these, which were big dramatic promises to yourself? I think it is more likely they were goals that you chose knowing they’d take time dedication and you did nothing more than kept at it.
